This Sunday is our day to celebrate the reformation. One of the mottos of the reformation was “Go to the Source.” The church had neglected the source of our faith, scripture. Instead they focused on interpretations of interpretations, commentaries on commentaries. This twisted the gospel and made it hidden. Last Sunday I preached at Jenna Jackson’s funeral. In order to dispel the myth of suicide as the unforgivable sin and give grace to the family, I went to the source. Here is my message to the family and friends of Jenna who were hurting and needed Gospel and not Law:
My heart goes out to the Jackson family. You have been through hell this week. I’ve been touched that as you are dealing with the devastating loss of Jenna, you have been worried about everyone else here today. When I asked you what you wanted out of this service, it was clear that you wanted to give people hope and a place to begin healing.
What you all have experienced this week is unspeakable. Jenna, of course was the first to experience torment and pain. Her physical decline and mental exhaustion led her down a dark path. I know that many of you did everything you could to ease her pain. You felt helpless against her condition and her hopelessness. You loved her the best you know how but it wasn’t enough to save her from death. You need to hear some words of hope. Thankfully, that is what I’m here for.
Let me first dispel an ugly myth that comes from ignorant, misinformed Christians, even pastors. People who commit suicide have not committed an unforgivable sin and go to hell. That is not taught by the church because it is not in scripture. We believe that Jesus came to help the tormented, not to judge them. The person who is on the brink of suicide has had their hope stolen from them by the world. Jenna was a victim of forces outside of her control. Jesus has mercy on people like Jenna. He had mercy on a man overwhelmed by demons. He had mercy on a woman who the world discarded. Jesus had mercy on lepers who were hopeless according to society. Jesus has compassion on those who are hopeless. We should also.
Jesus gave hope to those who were in mourning over his own death. In our second reading, his friends were locked away avoiding the authorities who crucified Jesus. They were experiencing all of the things you’ve gone through this week. They were shocked at his horrible death. They were angry at themselves for not putting a stop to it. The disciples would have changed a lot of things if they had to do it over again. They probably turned on each other in their grief and pain, playing the blame game. Then Jesus returns from the dead and his first words are “Peace to You.” His next words are “receive the Holy Spirit. If you forgive someone’s sins, they’re gone for good. If you don’t forgive sins, what are you going to do with them?” Jesus knew that the pain of death didn’t just evaporate, even when you have hope of the resurrection. They needed to forgive one another in order to get past their horrible week of mourning.
I imagine that in order for you to get past the pain of this week, you need forgiveness. For those of you who are tormenting yourself for not stopping Jenna’s death, you need to hear these words. You did not have the power to stop her. Ed and Cindy gave me Jenna’s last words that she had written down to her family. Jenna herself said, “There is nothing you or anyone could have done to prevent this.” She was actually forgiving you for any perceived responsibility you felt. Jenna knew that her death would devastate you and she wanted her last words to bring healing. Forgive yourself. Jenna forgives you and God forgives you. Honor Jenna by receiving her forgiveness.
But you also need to forgive Jenna. She asked for it when in her note she said, “I’m sorry. Words can’t express the tremendous remorse I have about this.” It is completely understandable if you are angry at Jenna. She denied you the ability to see her and give her love face to face. You miss her so much it hurts and Jenna caused that. The pain you feel is linked to the love you have for Jenna. The only way you can start to heal is to forgive Jenna like she asked. Holding onto your anger is poisonous. It’s not something you can do today and forget about. Forgiving Jenna is necessary every time you feel anger welling up in side you. Jesus said, “Forgive one another as I have forgiven you.” The key to healthy relationships with our Lord and with our loved ones is forgiveness. You still have a relationship with Jenna. Heal it with mercy and understanding.
In addition to forgiveness, you need hope in the midst of mourning. Our Romans passage talks about how this world is suffering but there is hope. There is pain but a day will come when the pain is over. All of creation is groaning in anticipation of the final day when everything is made right. There will be no more pain and no more tears of sadness. We joyfully anticipate that God will make sense out of all of our suffering.
Jenna hoped for that day. She was hopeless about her medical condition. She was in dread over her ability to overcome paralysis and excruciating physical pain. But she hoped for a day in which she would be free. She longed for a day when she would see you again but with no physical limitations or defects. Romans agrees with Jenna. God is going to make a new heaven and a new earth in which Jenna’s body is the way God intended. She will run and not grow weary. She will jump and not be faint. God is restoring the world to its original design.
Our hope to see Jenna again is not a wishful dream. It is backed by Jesus words, “I go to prepare a place for you. I am the way the truth and the life.” Jesus prepared a place for Jenna. There is room for you and I as well.
Death is a monster. Jenna experienced that monster for a long time. Her condition attacked her body, heart and mind. She grieved the loss of her ability to accomplish her goals. She saw her legs die a little bit every day. She knew well how horrible and powerful is death even before she died. But death is no match for God. God is all powerful. Jesus overcame the grave through his resurrection. That is why the Bible says, “I’m absolutely convinced that nothing—nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable—absolutely nothing in this world can get between us and God’s love because of the way that Jesus has embraced us.” We can say, “I’m convinced that even suicide can't get between us and God’s love.”
I’ve seen the love that you have for Jenna. I experienced it when I talked to Ed and Cindy, JD and Kendal. I saw how you love her through the facebook posts you shared. I read the evidence of Jenna’s love for you in her final words. She said, “I love you always. I’m with you always.” As an outsider, I can attest to witnessing the love that you shared through Jenna. Now imagine a God who loves her even more. Who created her and delights in her humor, character, idiosyncrasies, and abilities. She is getting to know the one who prepared a place for her. His love is deeper, wider and more powerful than ours. You don’t have to worry about Jenna. She’s in good hands.
By Grace through Faith.
